futility of attachments

Attachment is one item or feeling that the wise and sagacious would avoid like the plague. The reason for this has dawned on me well nigh over 60years of existence. I have been born a very warm and sentimental person and raised to love and be loved. Fortunately I  have had a happy and loving family., very warm parents and a host of cousins, sisters and a brother who have all showered their love  and affection on me..until very recently...My nieces and nephews have doted on me till they all grew up and learned the ways of this wicked world..Having basked in love and affection for about 50 years of my life, it is very painful and hard for me to now accept the reality that I now experience. I so sincerely and devoutly believed  that love begets love, gratefulness begets gratitude ,kinddeeds beget kindness in return.  It is now seen that most people have no time to think of kindness, gratitude or love. With a bundle of attachments taht I have accumulated over 60yrs, what do I do now ? It seems to be  futile. People do not want it nor are they willing to be tied down by affection. Maybe  it is my abberation. I oftentimes think..A lot has been said about attachments to anything in life because we have to leave them all behind when the time comes. That is why people get detached when they get on in years. It is easier to preach then practise detachment. We all succumb to feelings of joy or sorrow when it affects our own kids or our immediate family. How are seers able to remain stoically detached even in such circumstances." There is one answer.. They practise it at every step and this feeling has to grow on you, take roots and get firmly entrenched in our system. It is very difficult but what I now would like to try is just that. This is an age where our own flesh and blood would not hesitate to turn around and ask you why you still are attached to them and expect them to reciprocate the same!
How to begin doing it is the next poser. I think one should start with material things..,,,,,,,,,give up attachment to things..be it clothes, jewellery, etc ect..even good food. If we can gradually abstain from these by denying ourselves indulgences,resist temptations to buy a sari or jewel, or just observe upvas or fast on some days in a month, it would be the first step to abstinence thru restraint.This is also the period when we can give away what dont want to keep...better still give away what we want to keep ...or whatever we are attached to...
The next step would be to talk less amd slowly to take it to a mouna vrath practise on some days for a small duration. That time can be used to think of God.
It is important to avoid all kinds of gossip and lend no ear to any loose talk.If that is not done we could be dragged into the misery of attachment again.
The next step would be to devote more time to prayer and chanting slokas. This will surely give peace and calm and by the time we practise all these and try to live a more or less unattached life , we would be ready to touch HIS feet..

the incredible facebook

What facebook has done has revolutionized internet and its purpose has been stretched to amazing and incredible limits. I chanced upon facebook and being a very novice computer -user...in the sense that I hardly know anything technical about the computer or about its innumerable possibiliites.....I had to grope my way through to get on the socila networking site facebook and for that matter blogs too.  I did it all in fun and got myself into facebook and was quite wary initially about including unknown persons as friends, because I had heard about the inherent hazards that stalk social networking sites.
Initially I used to be so bugged with my daughter spending a lot of time interacting with people unknown, unseen and unheard on facebook! Now I have come to realize that one can make a lot of good friends on facebook, though literally not face to face, meet people with similar interest virtually, exchange views, share music, photos and thoughts.  After some time, these relationships grow on you, and become an integral part of one's life, so to say ,and who knows, these may be the people who will console you when u are sad or share your happiness whn you have something to feel joyful about., There are no strings attached to any of these relationships. Thats the best part..No obligations or favours..just pure camraderie and sharing and caring...It is a chance to like people whose faces we havent seen or may not even meet anytime. Ofcourse, we do see some faces in their profile pictures..and thats about it..get aglimpse of their family too from their profile if they choose to include those details...Soon facebookers  come to know that soand so is soand so's daughter, etc..Its interesting to open the page and see what people have written whether they like what you have said, whether they share the same sentiment etc. Its also fun toseethe photos uploaded, hear songs on U tube and remember great peots, singers etc depending on which group you belong to. There are differnet groups on facebookand we may join what interests us. song groups, travel groups , spiiritual groups etc.
i belong to a music group that is very active, interactive and passionate about music.we celebrate great singers, lyricicts, music directors, remember film stars' birthdays etc. There are also invites to music concerts and if one has time and interest and leisure one can even attend these.. I did attend one such music concert..shankar Jaikishen nite while I was in Bombay, thanks to my daughter, who got the tickets over the internet. I am sometimes overwhelmed by the enthusiasm and passion that people show when uploading old melodies.and thwe  discussion that follows is also quite a debate. People seem  to have so many facts and figures on thier fingertips!
There  is no agebar for joining facebook. Only thing is one must have a variety of interests to engage in debates or discussions on topics.I would say it makes me feel younger than I am really. Thanks to the founder of facebook. Its a lot of fun especially if we are on the wrong side of 60 provided we have humour and good spirit,and are willing to see different view points.

housing plots

Perieri’s girl,Hail to her glory!

Just this morning when speaking on the phone with my co-sister in Salem, our conversation veered towards the latest news.,.the 10^th class results. Our niece’s son had scored well and I was congratulating my co-sister on her grandson’s performance in the exams. Then we  were drawn naturally to the news of a Thalaivaasal girl having scored 496 out of 500 and having become a state ranker in this board exam. Then my sister told me that the girl was indeed from Perieri our sleepy little village near Attur where we used to have all our cultivable lands .and where this co-sister and brother-in-law had spent a major part of their lives. I have loved the breezy place which had just a scattering of lonely homes in the midst of paddy fields, both left uncultivated  and  ploughed and cultivated..To even imagine that kids of this tiny hamlet would ngo to school or wish to be educated is a  farfetched  dream. That was in those days. Nowadays it is a reality that India.s villages are getting deserted and people there want to migrate to the city, a haven for jobs and education. Besides, agriculture is neither a lucrative, attractive or easy prospect..

That takes me back to the good old days when my husband grew up in Salem and used to go holidaying during the summer vacation to where else but Perieri where we had a huge farm….cows, goat, calves, bullocks and buffaloes  all included. My husband reminisced that in his youth when he and his brother used to walk up from the road to the farm house ,,,a good 2 miles  that!!!…….the village folk used to rise and wish them just because they had been to school upto or beyond 5^th class. That to them was as big a thing as going to Oxford or Cambridge! Now looking at this latest news from that standpoint, I must admit our village folks have come a long way..that too in the case of a girl child. ,I believe this topper is from our Village Perieri and attended the school very near our Perieri farm and that her parents are both farm hands. Could be the child of one of those who worked in our fields…that is their 3^rd generation.. How proud I felt that Perieri has progressed and come along way in terms of thinking.,.in giving their daughters education. But the flip side is that our farms and fields are no more being tended and where from will we get our grains from hereafter?

Another good news is the top score achieved by the daughter of Revati who used to be our house- maid , whom we taught to read and write at home…Her own son goes to a polytechnic and her daughter has scored 90%. But she and her husband are still tilling the soil but with newer methods and machines. There is yet another success story of the daughter of our ironwallah who again has scored above 85% in her 10^th class exam..These are incidents that prove the adage;.where there is a will, there is a way. Poverty is just no excuse for those who have ambition and are raring to succeed doing hard work. Here I  have to  highlight the story of an IIT IIM graduate who has scorned all lucrative city jobs with big MNCs to take up farming and cultivation on his own. He says he is very happy content and peaceful., .far from the madding crowd and teeming millions and stress of mega cities.

This leaves me pondering whether my own life in the city is worth all that much, despite the fact that we enjoy all the luxuries and trappings of modern life. Is it necessary anyway, to be happy??? Think about it seriously.

Perieri’s girl,Hail to her glory!

Just this morning when speaking on the phone with my co-sister in Salem, our conversation veered towards the latest news.,.the 10^th class results. Our niece’s son had scored well and I was congratulating my co-sister on her grandson’s performance in the exams. Then we  were drawn naturally to the news of a Thalaivaasal girl having scored 496 out of 500 and having become a state ranker in this board exam. Then my sister told me that the girl was indeed from Perieri our sleepy little village near Attur where we used to have all our cultivable lands .and where this co-sister and brother-in-law had spent a major part of their lives. I have loved the breezy place which had just a scattering of lonely homes in the midst of paddy fields, both ,left uncultivated  and  ploughed and cultivated..To even imagine that kids of this tiny hamlet would ngo to school or wish to be educated is a  farfetched  dream. That was in those days. Nowadays it is a reality that India.s villages are getting deserted and people there want to migrate to the city, a haven for jobs and education. Besides, agriculture is neither a lucrative, attractive or easy prospect..

That takes me back to the good old days when my husband grew up in Salem and used to go holidaying during the summer vacation to where else but Perieri where we had a huge farm….cows, goat, calves, bullocks and buffaloes  all included. My husband reminisced that in his youth when he and his brother used to walk up from the road to the farm house ,,,a good 2 miles  that!!!…….the village folk used to rise and wish them just because they had been to school upto or beyond 5^th class. That to them was as big a thing as going to Oxford or Cambridge! Now looking at this latest news from that standpoint, I must admit our village folks have come a long way..that too in the case of a girl child. ,I believe this topper is from our Village Perieri and attended the school very near our Perieri farm and that her parents are both farm hands. Could be the child of one of those who worked in our fields…that is their 3^rd generation.. How proud I felt that Perieri has progressed and come along way in terms of thinking.,.in giving their daughters education. But the flip side is that our farms and fields are no more being tended and where from will we get our grains from hereafter?

Another good news is the top score achieved by the daughter of Revati who used to be our house- maid , whom we taught to read and write at home…Her own son goes to a polytechnic and her daughter has scored 90%. But she and her husband are still tilling the soil but with newer methods and machines. There is yet another success story of the daughter of our ironwallah who again has scored above 85% in her 10^th class exam..These are incidents that prove the adage;.where there is a will, there is a way. Poverty is just no excuse for those who have ambition and are raring to succeed doing hard work. Here I  have to  highlight the story of an IIT IIM graduate who has scorned all lucrative city jobs with big MNCs to take up farming and cultivation on his own. He says he is very happy content and peaceful., .far from the madding crowd and teeming millions and stress of mega cities.

This leaves me pondering whether my own life in the city is worth all that much, despite the fact that we enjoy all the luxuries and trappings of modern life. Is it necessary anyway, to be happy??? Think about it seriously.

gramaulaa/driving along a village road

It is strange how things hit you hard on the head and bring you back to terrafirma..We just went to worship at Nattamangalam , a village which really used to be like the back of beyond some years ago. we have been going there for the past 30 years every year sometimes once, twice or even thrice.. The small temple to our family goddess or kula deivam is there.From there we go to Mallasamudram, a bigger village where my husband grew up.and went to school till his 11th class.

What has always held my  fascination  has been the innocence and simplicity of the village folk. This time, I seem to have been enchanted with a lot more things which have obviously eluded my attention all these years. I could attribute it to my growing years or my better sense of observation honed and sharpened over the years with experience.

I immediately decided to write a blog on this because i felt that it might provide some useful insights to the younger generation most of which is city-bred., the first thing that i remember is the road which is lined on both sides with tamarind trees, most of which must be at least 80 to 100 years old. The  green foliage and branches of these trees form a lovely arch overhead and a cool green canopy. . It must have rained just a week ago and the green shoots were a tender light green .Else they would have been scorched by the unrelenting and punishing sunshine of the southern summer in May. We had travelled a long distance on the super highway and all we saw were a few carsm trucks and buses. There were no trees or shrubs at all except for the newly planted arali bushes in the median that separates the to and fro traffic. ,Although its fun to speed along the wonderful new toll roads, I still miss the treelined avenue type roads. The village roads have potholes and are insome places dusty and the ride bumpy ..but thats the fun..no racing or crashing! see the point?The other splendid sight is that of young village belles happily riding their bicycles or going doubles with their husbands or friends or brother. Its lovely to see the girl sit on the cross bar holding on to the handlebar and the boy peddling the cycle with her weight too. Perhaps thats his incentive or just romantic. I find it so simply romantic and chivalrous.!!There is one sight that we rarely see nowadays. ..the fire wood shop. I wonder who still uses firewood as fuel.in these days of gas and induction stoves.. Even my maid wouldn't deign to use kerosene stove or worse still firewood or coal. The answer was soon got..the brick kilns have plenty of use for jungle wood and that too rough hewn and in big chunks,,The small paan shops,the grocery stores, cycle repair stalls, cycle rental stands and  small tea shops are what make a village so delectable, delightful and delicious. The aroma of the morning coffe/tea wafts from a nearby stall as we stop to buy some flowers for the temple. The flower stall has its own colour and perfume but the best part is their smiling face and  hearty greeting ..We pass through green fields waiting to be harvested, ripe and luscious rice plants heavy with the grain and almost buckling under the weight, We also catch a glimpse of the fields being mechanically harvested with modern farm equipment and some that are lain bare after harvest, conical sheaths of corn , maize and sugarcane heaped up like a red indians wigwam..As we sped along I also noticed the village templesand the fervour and devotion with which people went topray there. The colourful and resplendent statues of the village watch Gods called Ayyanar did not escape my eyes.They are said to guard the village from evil and are mostly placed at the far end of the village..the boundary to be more precise. Thesight of the innocent village boysplaying with the wornout cycle wheel is a source of endless joy for me. I can go on and on about the charm of villages and its simple people and how we seldom care to give any of these sights a thought. Let us learn totake in the beauty of the cows grazing lazily, the sgeep bleating, the goats and the chicks crazily crossing the road just as a vehicle is about to pass, the cowherd with his minion and the rustic scene as it unfolds before you as we drive by. The cool fresh air is meant ot be taken in , the smells to be sniffed in and the sights seen and etched in our minds so that we remember to keep our cities as clean and pretty as our villages.....